Box of Life

It’s Advent. It’s the time of darker days leading to light.

It’s the time of year to quietly give away all of that  —

That

You know, the stuff sitting around — inside — which clutters the windowsill and prevents our shine from pouring out — whether through our eyes from our souls or from our heart/hearth and home into the dusk of shorter days of this time of our year.

And so, with longer nights, we are often faced with longer hours to look at the clutter of our hearts, souls, and living space.

So here’s is a little fill-in-the-blank for your soul:

Quickly, without looking really, fill in the following:

The real reason I can’t live this very moment, no matter how dark or busy or scheduled,

in joy, abundance, peace, poise, and power are:

1) _____________

2) _____________________

3) _________________________________

4) ____________________________________

5) ______________________________________

You might find a lot of name-calling when you fill in the blanks:

They didn’t, He refused, She said…

Name the “They” in your Life, or the He or the She’s that have somehow become crowded in with you in that clutter.

There’s not much space for the answers.

The reason is I want you to write really, really small…

Because these ‘reasons’ are making you live really, really small…

Now then put these  ‘reasons’ for living small in a plain cardboard box.the box of life

Why?

Better to do it outside yourself rather than keep that box of small-life inside, no?

Now, what to do with it?  Obviously it’s nothing of you— your best you shining and full of light of a life on task and on purpose — that wants to be handed on, given away, or wrapped into a nasty surprise for others…

No, this is a present for your self. You’ve put all your feelings of small and reasons for living any further moment of your life in a small way into this box.

Time for transformation:

Now go through your little list and change the pronoun to “I”…

In doing so, you’ve transformed your box of ‘reasons for living small’ to a box of choices for living your life fully, by realizing the ‘reason’ is a personal one:

If a She didn’t love you, you’ve transformed it to “I don’t love me”;

If a He let you down, you’ve transformed it into “I let me down”;

 If They won’t accept you, or believe in you, or support you,  you’ve transformed it into

“I won’t accept me, or support me, or believe in me”…

Open your box, look at your reasons for living small, as if in a box, and change them into

‘I … “  but also add:

“But now I can…’

The magic of this present to yourself is you can end each of your ‘living small’ pinchy reasons by this magic of the season incantation:

‘But now I can… support me, believe in me, love me, be reliable to me…

 — with light, love, and heart and soul and light—

 now I can.”

And as you do, you are letting the light —

of your soul and your being,

your shine,

and the infinite energy of the Universe which animates you into life,

moment to moment, breath to breath —

Into your personal Box of Life, clearing darkness,

allowing the light to flow in, out and into this moment of your life-time  here.

No open box can hold the light, after all..

Now you can radiate shine and leave that smallness behind.

And now you can choose:

Live now, in this moment, no matter how busy, scheduled, or dark,

shining and feeling it from inside.

You are choosing to live On Task and On Purpose, shining brightly,

beaming out of your Box of Life.

Choose light, choose love, choose abundance, choose joy,

choose using your unique talent,

and see what happens… now!

The light is soon returning to us; Life is here now.

Blessings on your day

and thank you to each and everyone who has honored me with

a moment of their time spent reading and writing to me his year!

Elizabeth Darby

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Choosing.

Choosing.

This is a word much used and very misunderstood.

 And this word above is in a tense that implies ‘going to’, isn’t it?

 As in, ‘I’m choosing to . . . ‘.  Really? When. Have you chosen yet?

 Although it sounds like “I’m choosing [now] to…” followed bywhatever action is being undertaken (see below for a test), it’s actually saying and feeling, ‘I’m going to choose for the future this . . . _______’.

 That’s just it. “I’m choosing to __________” includes the feeling that you/I/we don’t already possess what it yearned for in our heart of hearts, whether great work, great recompense, great health, great family, great whatever.

 Try it: Insert your most simultaneously feared and yearned-for word of this moment to test this:

 I’m choosing to________

I’m choosing to live fully…

I’m choosing to ‘be happy’ …

I’m choosing to leave this closet of dread . . .

I’m choosing to attract _________ whatever it is you feel you don’t have…because clearly you don’t. You’re still choosing it.

 

Now try it in the active form:

 I choose . . .

There’s a sense of immediacy about this.

 It serves to pop the energetic bubble of despair and let the fresh air in.

 It serves to make now (as it is above, so it is below) joyous, abundant, life-filling happiness incarnate. Try it:

 I choose happiness. 

(Now! Pop! There it is!).

 

I choose joy in life and living fully

(oops, it’s already underway by the time you’ve added “and living…”).

 

I choose ____________ ; by the time you’ve said ‘leaving this closet of despair, you’ve already left.

 

I choose ___________  [to attract ] — again, no time to “attract” but rather to experience it as it’s here and now, as in:

I choose abundance;

I choose great work;

I choose health . . .

And the important thing is it ‘feels’ as if it’s already here.

Because it is:  As it is Above, So it is Below: Joyous; Spirit; Loving; Abundant; Light-filled. Choose it — oh, here it is!

 

‘I choose’ is a prayer of now.

 

‘I’m choosing’ is a ‘gonna. It’s a category into which we pour our future hoped-for experiences.

 

‘I choose’ is a dare to self to live, now.  Try it:

I choose love.

I choose you.

I choose abundance.

I choose this company/work/hours/exchange of life-for-security (seeming).

I choose this person to be my beloved.

I choose health.

I choose joy.

I choose life.

 

And, of course, that’s all any of us can do: choose moment by moment.

‘I’m choosing to . . .” seems to put a Life of living off for just a moment for an added clause ‘to be/do/soon’ an infinitive of infinite time forthcoming. It feels like fingers crossed behind the back and the teeniest bit of doubt in one’s heart. “I’m choosing to (at some uncertain time) to . . . , really, I am!”

 

It’s amazing what 3 little letters can do to drag out despair in a moment and leave us hijacked by our ‘intent’ — ‘I’m choosing to . . .’  is kind of like “warming up the tele’ “for those who remember sitting around waiting for the TV picture tube to ‘warm up’ into the picture we waited (and waited and wanted) to see.

 

There’s a lot in the world about choosing and choice, so forgive me if any of this is a repeat of others. I’ve found, however, that we each mix up the two phrases very often, especially when reaching for a feeling of ‘things are going to get better,’ we often reach for the ‘best thought we can,’ and that thought tends to push things into the future, rather than right now.

I am choosing, or, I choose. Now.

‘I choose’ also gets around the feeling that there’s a distance between what is reality now and what you hope for: even when there’s little abundance in sight, affirming “I choose abundance” pops the yearning and despair and gives instant “yes, I do” inside.  “I am choosing abundance” just has a ‘to come someday’ added on to the back of the feeling. What is in back of the feeling is what is real to you, now, in this moment. So choose. Now and wholly in the only moment you control. Now.

 

So, try it. From my workshops and consults, I find that starting here:

 

I choose  ______________ (top five items for Now)

1)_________________

2) _________________

3) _________________

4) ________________

5) ________________

 

… pops the energetic bubble of despair and brings happiness, joy, abundance and, perhaps most importantly, the clarity of “Yes, I choose __________ ” to your Life-time. Playing Right Now.

 

Blessings on your choices today,

Elizabeth Darby

 

 

“I can, if I know I can…”

“I can, if I know I can”

 

Ernst Holmes wrote in 1968 of how we can live a life On Task and On Purpose. He didn’t call it that; his prose was much more eloquent. Yet today I am reminded it is so similar a process:

“Overcome negative mental attitudes,” he wrote. “Your basic thought here should be: ‘I can, if I know I can.’ Negative thoughts will produce negative results, while positive thinking surrounds you with an atmosphere which tends to draw good into your experience. Successful people do not permit themselves to think of failure….This doesn’t mean arbitrary or dogmatic thinking; rather it means a sort of good-natured flexibility with yourself, because you are the greatest single asset you will ever possess…”

You are the greatest single asset

you will ever possess.

I don’t think one can hear — or live — this enough, especially with ‘good-natured flexibility with yourself’.

Doubt — doubt of God, doubt of value, doubt of self, doubt of being Loved and lovable, doubt of having anything good going in one’s life — and its dark twin shadow of, well, living in the Shadows of Life are the cause of the shaking of our knees in facing each moment when things look like they’re going badly.

Instead, Shake it off.

Enough.

Draw a Finish Line — right here.

Here, now, you are Finished with those shadows of doubts that cast a pall over the day and a spell over this moment of life.

Step into light and let it flow out of you.

You, full of light shining forth, just for this moment

—and now this moment, and now this one —

are the greatest single asset

you will ever possess.

Take a moment now and smile. That’s a shine beginning…here.

Blessings,

Elizabeth Darby

 

 

Shazam! Poof!

Magic!  We jumped forward an hour today — to ‘daylight savings time’ — and none of us did a thing. That’s either a ‘loss’ of an hour or a ‘gain’ of more time when we want it and need it, at the end of a work day. It’s either loss or gain, depending on your view.

Isn’t the same thing true of abundance? Either we experience it or we experience the lack of it, gain or loss, but it’s the same moment either way.

A part of the reason for my workshops and one-on-one sessions are to help each of us become aware of fleeting moments, the magic of life, and to fill each moment with our talents, our passion, and an abundance of shine from inside out. That’s what we each experience in abundance when we are On Task and On Purpose.

As the saying goes, we see what we look for: Looking for limits, they’re all around you; but so is an endless horizon, if you choose to look for that instead. Looking for permission, you won’t find it outside yourself. Looking for abundant resources . . . even those are found inside first, then seem to magically appear outside once you feel the abundance inside.

You just have to believe that all you need is right here, right now. In this moment there is enough time and enough resources. There’s a moment — right now — in which you can just be your best you and feel abundant as you are. Right … now. Breathe. And right … now. Breathe.

Beyond the Superstar-life driven into our heads by our icon culture, there is a little but very important question at the root of having “enough” … How much do you need, in this tiny moment in which you have all you could ever feel?

So, just for fun, Shazam! Poof!  You have, in this moment, all the resources you ever needed or desired, and all the time in the world you could ever want.

How will you spend the moments of this beautiful day?

First, I’d ______________________________________

Then I’d _____________________________________

Shazam! Poof! Feel the abundance of life and joy and shine in this moment.

Blessings!

Elizabeth Darby