Box of Life

It’s Advent. It’s the time of darker days leading to light.

It’s the time of year to quietly give away all of that  —

That

You know, the stuff sitting around — inside — which clutters the windowsill and prevents our shine from pouring out — whether through our eyes from our souls or from our heart/hearth and home into the dusk of shorter days of this time of our year.

And so, with longer nights, we are often faced with longer hours to look at the clutter of our hearts, souls, and living space.

So here’s is a little fill-in-the-blank for your soul:

Quickly, without looking really, fill in the following:

The real reason I can’t live this very moment, no matter how dark or busy or scheduled,

in joy, abundance, peace, poise, and power are:

1) _____________

2) _____________________

3) _________________________________

4) ____________________________________

5) ______________________________________

You might find a lot of name-calling when you fill in the blanks:

They didn’t, He refused, She said…

Name the “They” in your Life, or the He or the She’s that have somehow become crowded in with you in that clutter.

There’s not much space for the answers.

The reason is I want you to write really, really small…

Because these ‘reasons’ are making you live really, really small…

Now then put these  ‘reasons’ for living small in a plain cardboard box.the box of life

Why?

Better to do it outside yourself rather than keep that box of small-life inside, no?

Now, what to do with it?  Obviously it’s nothing of you— your best you shining and full of light of a life on task and on purpose — that wants to be handed on, given away, or wrapped into a nasty surprise for others…

No, this is a present for your self. You’ve put all your feelings of small and reasons for living any further moment of your life in a small way into this box.

Time for transformation:

Now go through your little list and change the pronoun to “I”…

In doing so, you’ve transformed your box of ‘reasons for living small’ to a box of choices for living your life fully, by realizing the ‘reason’ is a personal one:

If a She didn’t love you, you’ve transformed it to “I don’t love me”;

If a He let you down, you’ve transformed it into “I let me down”;

 If They won’t accept you, or believe in you, or support you,  you’ve transformed it into

“I won’t accept me, or support me, or believe in me”…

Open your box, look at your reasons for living small, as if in a box, and change them into

‘I … “  but also add:

“But now I can…’

The magic of this present to yourself is you can end each of your ‘living small’ pinchy reasons by this magic of the season incantation:

‘But now I can… support me, believe in me, love me, be reliable to me…

 — with light, love, and heart and soul and light—

 now I can.”

And as you do, you are letting the light —

of your soul and your being,

your shine,

and the infinite energy of the Universe which animates you into life,

moment to moment, breath to breath —

Into your personal Box of Life, clearing darkness,

allowing the light to flow in, out and into this moment of your life-time  here.

No open box can hold the light, after all..

Now you can radiate shine and leave that smallness behind.

And now you can choose:

Live now, in this moment, no matter how busy, scheduled, or dark,

shining and feeling it from inside.

You are choosing to live On Task and On Purpose, shining brightly,

beaming out of your Box of Life.

Choose light, choose love, choose abundance, choose joy,

choose using your unique talent,

and see what happens… now!

The light is soon returning to us; Life is here now.

Blessings on your day

and thank you to each and everyone who has honored me with

a moment of their time spent reading and writing to me his year!

Elizabeth Darby

Whose Side?

Page 44, Here You Begin: A Guided Journal to Discovering Your Passions, Your Purpose and to Creating the Work Only You Can Do:

 

Whose side are you on?

 

First thought only please . . .

 

I am on the side of __________________

That needs me to do this: __________________________

Here’s what I do with my time here to show this: ________________________________

For fun:

Make a little sketch of the symbol you wear or carry that shows your allegiance.

 

 

Some of us are on the side of Beauty. Some of us are on the side of Right, or Justice, or Knowledge, or Excellence. Or the Vulnerable or the Voiceless or Freedom.  Or Truth . . .

These are some of the bigger things each of us is willing to work for in our lives or with our life time here — or fight for with our lives…

We sometimes also realize we are on the side of Music, or Art, or Wilderness, or Wildlife, or the Homeless, whether people or pets.  These are more specific, but just as important, as each specific issue is symbolic of something larger we are willing to stand for. Literally stand for, not as in a gesture, but as in standing to assist.

Every moment of every day, you choose a side to be on, whether you know it or not. It’s a cause you were put here to take up and assist, so now acknowledge on whose side you are — and let it be the standard on your path as you journey from here, today.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Step by step

Quote

“You must first have the knowledge of your power; second, the courage to dare; third, the faith to do.”

Charles F. Haanel, 1919

What better way to know your power than to feel you are here for a purpose; it is one only you can do well, given your specific talents, abilities, and the spark of care that you feel for that which moves you?

What is it you care about so much you feel

it to be impossible not to move toward it,

with care for it overflowing in every step?

_____________________________

_____________________________

What better way to have courage to dare than to act without thought of self in service of that which moves you, and using some or all of abilities you feel you do well — and the world smiles back in return?

What do you do, and do so well the world smiles at you

when you are in the midst of it?

___________________________

___________________________

And the faith to do . . . ah, there’s the task.

Faith is making the plan, starting at the point where what you dream as your life and life-work is still only a vision, lovely and glowing, and moving backwards to where you sit today, making the plan.

Faith is seeing something that doesn’t necessarily appear to others, but which you see and feel clearly.

Faith is knowing something exists when you don’t tangibly see it. Faith is the vase with water in it, neither half full nor half empty, but rather overflowing. For it is filled with water to the level you see it, and it is filled with air that you can’t see overflowing out of it and enveloping you and all that is in this beautiful world.

Faith to do is taking little step by little step from where you are today to the vision you see in your imagination and taking action in faith you have all the air and water you need now and en route.

So take a little a step today and see where you are! What a beautiful day!

Blessings on your little step today…

Elizabeth Darby

You Have a Choice

You have a choice, right in this moment.

“Choose not to worry.”

Ernst Holmes wrote this as his second of recommendations to live well.

“Worry is an acquired habit. . . . You didn’t worry when you were a child. . . .  Loose [the past] and let it go and look forward to the future with hope. Build up a great idea of yourself the way you would like to be and work toward it, knowing that God is your partner and friend, and wills you to be happy. Think, feel, and live this.”

How much of  worry — anyone’s worry — is fear?

Most of it, it would seem. Fear of what’s to come; fear of what has been; fear for won’t be or will be that isn’t wanted…. worry is fear of those things out of our control, moment to moment.

And as the proverbial truth reminds us, worrying is akin to praying for what we don’t want, keeping it present and with us, a fear shadowing our every step.

Unfortunately worry also defines our steps — was that a stumble? A wrong path? Am I in danger? Will I fall or flail?…

So how can we choose to not worry, to live like children of light again, when worry trips us so? It seems almost to easy to say just let it go and look to a future with hope” when the shadows are marring our view.

The answer is in the action of it:  to choose to Work.  Holmes suggests the sure way: To envision a great idea of yourself and then work — work toward it, work in the moment, lean into idea.

It seems to me there are two working ways into the light from the shadow of worry, as actions take us out of the land of internal shadow.  Use either one, as the magic is in the work of working toward your vision, knowing you are not alone in it:

Here’s the first:

People don’t know this, but I’m really, really good at:

_______________________________________

________________________________________

 

. . . And I like doing these things.

 

Here’s why:

In feeling — leaning into — why you love doing what you’re really good at, you begin the work of building into the vision of you as you wish to become. Even just feeling that great idea of you, and then working toward it, seems to loose the worries, moment by moment.

Here’s another way to loose those worries:

I care deeply about

___________________________

___________________________

and I’m good at …

___________________________

___________________________

So clearly the World needs me to put these together

in this way as my work while I’m here:

_________________________________

_________________________________

Finding a purpose — your purpose — in the world and actively leaning into it, moment by moment, brings light into the shadows that plague us in the worries and fears. Focusing on what we care deeply about strengthens us, as acting On Task and On Purpose, we find we are working, in light and shining light out.

Action looses the worries and the fears — the choice is yours to take it.

Walk, no Act, in light and with blessings today…

Elizabeth Darby

Link

More on Success:

This lovely reflection from business professor Clay Christensen, from a couple years ago in the Harvard Business Review. I keep it handy for days when I, too, need to remember that Success is a life-work as well as a moment-to-moment state of smiles:

How Will You Measure Your Life

by Clayton Christensen

http://hbr.org/2010/07/how-will-you-measure-your-life/ar/1?cm_sp=most_widget-_-hbr_articles-_-How%20Will%20You%20Measure%20Your%20Life%3F

Blessings on your day!

Elizabeth Darby

A Lot of Truth

There’s a lot of Truth out there these days.

A lot of it is good Truth:

Like we are really good at doing what uses both our talents and our heart-felt enthusiasm, otherwise we risk the fashion faux pas of wearing brown shoes and a black belt … and a half-smile of enduring another day choosing one over the other;

Like we need to define our own success to look like something we actually want to wear and which looks good on us, rather than the latest style;

Like we don’t walk alone no matter how dark it looks and despite all appearances in certain moments of closet-hiding.

Moments of closet-hiding? You know the ones I mean:

You wake up thinking Today is the Day I’ll _____________________________ (find that job; feel talented for once or again; know that it’s possible I’m here to do Good Work that pays, despite age, circumstance, and time taken off for care-taking kids or parents or both; not feel like yesterday’s left-over beer when handing in yet another resume).

Choose any or all or fill in the blank with your own grinning admission.

And then you find that, well, yes you do still feel like any or all of these and the best place to deal is in the warm closet where your imagination can soothe you with possibility. Closet-hiding.

It gets pretty stuffy in that closet after a while.

And this is where we can dare to let the Truth in, like a bit of fresh air or a crack of light into our dark, somewhat stuffy place:

There is something within each of us

guiding each of us to what works best for us individually

and to the Work we are here to do.

No one is alone in that closet; there’s a guide in there with you, shining a light on your possibility but also asking you to listen carefully to your inner shining wisdom:

No one else can do exactly what you are here to do.

You have precisely the tools, talents

and soul-filled enthusiasm needed to

create the work — your work — in this world

where it is sorely needed.

And if you’re not sure about that, while basking in the possibility of this Truth, get out your pen or sketchbook and complete this simple fill-in-the-blank-of-your-Soul:

I’m an inventor and I can make anything work.

This is a description or sketch of the invention

I feel the world needs most:

_______________________________________

_______________________________________

_______________________________________

_____________________

Name of my invention

My International Prize Awarded on:

________________________

(day/month/year)

Here are the steps I took to make it:

1)

2)

3)

Now that’s wisdom shining from your Soul. And work waiting for you to do today.

And that’s a Truth.

Blessing on your day!

Elizabeth Darby

Dear Reader:

“You are not perfect at anything …

except at being you.

You are perfectly made, however, for the life and work

you are here to do in your life-time. . . “

So this guide to discovering you, your Passions and Purpose,
and designing the Life Path only You can do is written for you —

It is for you who feels the simultaneous excitement, confusion, and freezing fear brought by the myriad decisions before you as you think of the Life and living you build day by day, moment by moment, as you live. It is what you do in this moment that makes your dream made tangible in this world. It’s how you fill this moment that reveals your essential Being in this world.

It’s how you fill this moment

that reveals your essential Being in this world.

 

The possibilities for how any of us spend our time here on Earth, and how we put into service our energy, talents — the choices of what to make of ourselves — are indeed endless. Such choices are limited only by a combination of imagination, self-confidence and sheer courage to meet our own Self in the process. There is not a circumstance that limits the possibility of becoming exactly who we each dream to be, as it is only the actions of each moment that define each of us, revealing our Spirit.

This is how my book begins. . .

And I wrote it for you.

There is not a circumstance that limits

the possibility of becoming

exactly who we each dream to be . . .

Like any work, it was written for its author as well.

I wrote it when feeling particularly lost, at a crossroads in life:  children were grown and going, 24-years of marriage collapsing under the weight of separate careers, and my life path ahead totally unknown.  Would I return to the busy life of international journalism, having now successfully guided not just my offspring onto their own springboards and to lives they were loving but many of their friends as well?

Or, well, exactly what would I do to somehow combine my love of helping others discover their talents and passions and also bear Truth and Witness to the brilliance of those around me as they sought encouragement? What exactly was a Vocation anyway  . . . and does it pay the bills?

I was sitting alone in an old stable-room turned into dismal yet neutral hotel room. You know the kind — the windows were a little too high to look out, and revealed only the sky from the little desk pressed against the wall under them.   Although I imagined the horses that used to bed in the room, for comfort if anything, I found all I could see were the stars above the buildings of the stable-block. I wondered if the former residents, too, looked out this window for greener pastures to run in?

Then, as now all one could see

was a vast sky

full of stars: 

Infinite and improbable possibility as a blanket

for the soul on a dark night.

With me on this particular evening was not the reassurance of a warm muzzle and sweet hay breath of a horse but instead a little square pad of sheets of paper.

Each little square was separate and not connected to the next save for the box in which they sat.  I took one, curious to see what note I could write to my Self, looking for guidance.

Instead I took one then another and found a whole list of questions download through me onto each of these little sheets of paper.  Well, the little 3 by 3 squares were connected — by a guide leading me to my purpose and passion  — as the questions, simply questions that I was to answer, guided me to write down my dreams, longings, plans, abilities and things I cared about. Suddenly it was all on paper.  It was a map of my soul’s purpose and the squares became the stepping-stones to living this life-time here: On Purpose and On Task.

OP/OT

On Purpose and On Task.

This is what the World — this World of breathtaking beauty and piercing hurts — needs each of us to be.  On Purpose and On Task, being as excellent as each of us can be at using the gifts and talents we carry as tools of our expression in our life-times here.  To do what?  To do the Work we are each here to do; and if in doubt of what that might be, then to follow our yearnings and create as much beauty as is possible.

So if you, too, are feeling lost at this particular cross-roads, look up at the sky. Take a deep breath. Maybe there’s something here, or in my book or at a workshop that might help you.  I hope so!  For a quick start,  Take a look at the page Questions where I excerpt some of my book.  There you can  fill in the blanks of your soul as you discover or rediscover your dreams, your talents, your passions, your magic and remember how to be the Sovereign of your time here on Earth.

My book, Here You Begin, is being published by Chesterton & Davies, Ltd. It should be out any week.

To do what? 

To guide you to discover and do the Work

you are here to do;

And if in doubt of what that might be, then it is a guide to follow your yearnings to create as much beauty

as is possible while you are here

in the way only you can.

What you can do and who you are is greatly needed in this world.

In the meantime, I’ll post a few of the questions from my book  here …  maybe you will want to pre-order the book via the publisher at the link on the right!!  Or maybe you’ll want to try it out here a bit first.

I also offer personal coaching in finding your path and you OP/OT as well as workshops where we gather in beautiful places to go through the exploration together as well as take a keen look at the resistance felt or at the hurdles to  what is stopping any of us from being our best Self.  And then we walk around them together.  Dates on these to come but plans are for one to be held near you very soon.

If you have a group you’d like me to talk to — whether your friends or church group, your teen’s school or a job-search shelter for the many of us out of work and hurting just now, contact me!  As a journalist I found that asking questions proved to be the quickest and easiest way to discovering the obvious truth; in doing so with a gentle hand to hold, it re-ignites the fire of our souls to be remembered and put to use.

In the meantime, come back for a question of the day, week, month or set up a private coaching session with me.  You can do so through the links at the right!

Until we connect, remember: You and your gifts are needed in this world!

Believing in You,

Elizabeth D.